Actions don’t always speak louder than words
They (I don’t know who) say actions speak louder than words. That’s not always true. Yesterday somebody said something to me that put a lump in my throat…and it wasn’t a girl. It was far more effective than if they had offered to do my dishes or something.
11 responses to “Actions don’t always speak louder than words”
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For some reason I’ve recently found myself thinking quite often about Paul’s instruction to the Ephesian church: “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”
I think ‘unwholesome’ isn’t just a list of ‘bad’ or ‘dirty’ words, but anything which does not tend to wholeness, or to building up. Our words have power to create or destroy – as we’d expect, being created in God’s image. Cheers for the illustration, Tim.
Very true. And if you are only saying helpful things the dirty talk and swearing should disappear anyway.
Hmm… it’s easy to miss the point when it comes to “dirty talk and swearing”
“You, sir, are an ignoramous” isn’t uplifting, whereas “Fucken aye mate, your set was mint!” is.
Note the first part of the verse Azza quoted. Building others up is contrasted with unwholesome talk. Your examples fall into the “not building up” and “unwholesome” categories respectively.
Oh, and Aaron also mentions being created in God’s image. Using the highly imaginative and original adjective you used as an example is not reflecting God’s presence in your life.
Well, guys, the particular thing that has been impressing me about Paul’s remark is that he seems to make unwholesome talk depend on the needs of the listener(s).
This is challenging because it goes much further than merely stopping us from swearing, making toilet humour, or smuttty jokes. It also stops us from cutting another’s throat politely.
Judas kissed Jesus in order to betray him. I wonder whom we crucify with all the right forms. I wonder who I destroy while being right.
Amen
Tim, I took so long drafting that last bit that I missed your last reply.
To be sure, there are ways of speaking that are unhelpful in virtually any circumstance. Some word-imagery is always disgusting and degrading, and serves no good need. Also, avoiding some language – ‘swearing’ – still communicates to most people in our society a type of respectfulness, a perception of wholeness, a ‘difference’ that is perhaps valuable. If people are looking for something to aspire to, then perhaps that helps to provide it.
But langauge-use is very multi-dimensional, serving many purposes. I’m reminded that God’s spokesmen have employed some pretty colourful imagery from time to time. I think of Paul calling the gains of his previous life shit (translated ‘rubbish’), and his jest that he wished the Judaizers would go all the way and cut their penises right off.
So I’m reluctant to take one word ‘in the abstract’ and say that someone’s use of it is always wrong, and can’t reflect an imagery of God.
I would say “f*#k” is never useful. However, comment 4 was made badly and without much thought…and I agree with you.
Anyway, my original post was positive – that words can sometimes be far more effective than actions. And my example was somebody saying something to me that I really needed to hear and it put a lump in my throat because I saw God’s image in them so clearly at that moment. It was so obviously Him speaking to and encouraging me through that individual…and it was cool.
amen